Etch A Romney

Mittens declared ultimate victory last night in New Hampshire, proving that having plenty of money to carve up your opponents in television commercials and having a willingness to radically alter your beliefs—then pretend they have been your beliefs all along!—is all that is necessary to dupe folks eager to throw Obama out of the White’s House.

This speech was the first in what will be a long series of attempts to re-sketch Romney and make him more attractive to folks who don’t tote placards or guns at Tea Party rallies.

Puke-worthy in his speech was his “simple message” to “heartbroken” single moms, gas-poor seniors, and “the mom and dad who never thought they’d be on food stamps.”  That message was,

Hold on a little longer. A better America begins tonight.

Yeah, hold on until the Romney-Ryan budget lifts you up, up, and away!

Mittens will “unite every American who knows in their heart that we can do better!” That means those of us—about half the country— who would rather put a peg through our pupil than vote for him, are S.O.L.! That’s some unity.

Romney also claimed that Obama “will run a campaign of diversions, distractions, and distortions.” Now considering that The Etch Man just finished running a campaign of diversions, distractions, and distortions, and considering that he will have to continue to divert, distract, and distort in order to sell his always-evolving self to the electorate, that is quite a compliment.

And Mittens, who brought the world Romneycare, offered Obama another huge compliment when he gave him credit for the eventual end of  American capitalism:

With Obamacare fully installed, government will come to control half the economy, and we will have effectively ceased to be a free enterprise society.

What? No more Bain Capital? What in Kolob’s name are we gonna do? What will the vultures eat?

Perhaps my favorite passage in the speech was this one, which I look forward to beholding:

In the America I see, character and choices matter. And education, hard work, and living within our means are valued and rewarded. And poverty will be defeated, not with a government check, but with respect and achievement that is taught by parents, learned in school, and practiced in the workplace.

Now, I know right-wingers like to talk about the grandiosity of Barack Obama, what with his slowing the oceans’ rise (promise kept, by the way!) and his attempt to heal the planet (Big O’s still working on that one), but he ain’t never said he could defeat poverty. Heck, Jesus couldn’t even do that! If I thought Mittens could end poverty, I wouldn’t walk, I’d run to the polls in November to symbolically touch the hem of his holy garment!

But he did get something right in the speech:

Today, the hill before us is a little steep but we have always been a nation of big steppers.

Yes, yes. Folks like Romney have been big steppin’ all over the rest of us for years, and the magical thing about these big steppers is that they can get about half of the folks crushed under their big steppin’ heels to crawl out and vote for them! That’s some voodoo!

Toward the end of his speech, Mr. Etch hit a theme that was both offensive and effective, in terms of penetrating deep into the souls of his pale-faced supporters:

We’ll stop the days of apologizing for success at home and never again apologize for America abroad.

There was a time – not so long ago – when each of us could walk a little taller and stand a little straighter because we had a gift that no one else in the world shared. We were Americans. That meant something different to each of us but it meant something special to all of us. We knew it without question. And so did the world.

Those days are coming back. That’s our destiny.

Forget the lie about Obama apologizing abroad and focus on the subtext of his ending message, the message that Etch-A-Romney will bring to Americans:

America isn’t “special” to President Obama. He is a stranger among us, an interloper who doesn’t deserve to live in the White’s House.



  1. ansonburlingame

     /  April 25, 2012

    A vision that I like,

    OK, let’s talk about poverty. Poverty in Ameria is different in many ways from poverty around the world. Go to a refugee camp in Somalia or the Sudan then into a ghetto in America. Big differences in myview.

    Detroit is a cesspool in America but compares in no way to scences recelntly described in this blog in Pakistan.

    But of course we can and should do better in America. In my view the path forward is exactly what Romney described, “….but with respect and achievement that is taught by parents, learned in school, and practiced in the workplace.”

    There is not enough money in the world to defeat poaverty in America by throwing money at it. There has to be a better and different way. Garnering individual self-respect, incentive to achieve, hard work, a sense of “honor” to try always to do the next right thing are American values of long standing.

    But such values are rarely present in an American ghetto, in my view. Take all the suit cases filled with money you like into such ghettos and you will not instill such values as well.

    Progressives seem to believe that providing enough money to people will change their values to the better and more traditional American way. Yep, just like Detroit, right?



  2. Treeske

     /  April 25, 2012

    Anson, why do you need to refer to the ghettos and of all places Somalia? Doesn’t our area have enough poverty material for you? Is our area the example of individual respect, incentive to achieve, hard work, exemplary parental responsibility and all the other long standing American values? Or, the area being practically all Republican, is honorable enough for you?


    • Treeske,

      Three guesses why he refers to Detroit and the ghettos and Somalia? Ah, heck, I’ll just tell ya: By his reckoning, compared to the meth-cookin’ palefaces around these parts, those Negroes don’t know nothin’ ’bout no respect and achievement and hard work and honor and doing “the next right thing” by the “traditional American way,”

      You see? Our miscreants don’t define us like Detroit’s do.



    • Treeske, I have had this discussion with AB in the past. I am glad I am not the only one that sees this strange obsession with Detroit. But just for good measure, today’s Globe crime page only has 1 shaken baby, 1 death in a homeless camp, OK. working on a meth bill, and one porn case involving a minor. Oh, to live in the righteous safe haven of SW Missouri!



  3. Romney’s theme for the campaign seems clear now that he is re-setting for the general election and, as Duane notes, reaching out to the more moderate parts of the party. Appeals to the values of the protestant work ethic have always resonated with the public, and well they should because a great deal of the nation’s prosperity derived from hard work. That was demonstrated by the enduring popularity of Horatio Alger’s rags-to-riches stories in the nineteenth century.

    But any vision of economics which portrays it as simple is badly skewed from reality. America’s wealth derived not only from hard work but, importantly, from vast natural resources, cheap land and thriving population growth. The latter factors are now diminished relative to others and living in a complex, technological modern society and a global economy is no longer so simple. This is well demonstrated by the widening gulf between the very rich and the rest of the population and by the dramatic failure-in-progress of the nation’s healthcare system.

    Romney touts the notion that reducing taxes even further on the rich will lift the nation out of its debt, but the numbers simply don’t add up. The coming election will determine whether the body politic will embrace reality or will instead select Horatio Alger’s fantasy world.


    • Your completely rational point about the complexity of our society and the suggestion that a simple vision of economics (and public policy) is not sufficient to deal with such complexity, will, I fear, be completely lost on a large swath of the electorate.

      Black and white. Keep it simple. That stuff sells, unfortunately.



  4. ansonburlingame

     /  April 25, 2012

    To all,

    Detroit, to me is a metaphor, an example of what ails urban America. Pick your own spot and use it. 50n years of “money” and it is still a cesspool.

    Duane was bashing Romney because he has a different approach to mitigating poverty. He could apply the same approach in some ways to crime, which is OUR problem in Joplin, the meth capital of the country or close to it.

    Throw all the money you like at Sheriff Archie Dunn (and he will take it for sure) but clean our the meth problem in Joplin? Not by much, in my view.

    You cannot PAY people to get out of poverty, by and large. They must decide for themselves that poverty is not what they want and become willing to expend the effort, using money when available, to rise above poverty.

    Sure the world of America has changed, a lot in the last 50 years. No one can “go west” today for free land and better life. A better life must now be created where they are today, by and large

    What does it take to really rise above poverty? You know it as well as I do, a good education, first and foremost. Not only have we failed to provide such in our public schools since at least the 1960’s, things are getting worse, not better in such schools, and we all know that as well, or should.

    Of course it is “not as simple as that” BUT “that” is what it boils down to, individual incentive and work to sustain one’s self and family for a lifetime. Of course the correct rejoiner to such a statement is “what family”, with 73% of all black births to single mothers, today and 53% of all births to single parent mothers, of all skin color, that are under 30 years of age.

    And you know as well as I do that those 53% births are not to single mothers living on Park Ave. in NYC.

    Yes it takes a village, but the village must as well consist of “families” (with traditional American values), in my view. But I never heard Hillary say such, did you?



    • AB, I looked up some birth stats, very interesting:

      Teen births: Mich. 32.7%, Mo. 41.6%, Ks. 43.8%, Ok. 60.1%, Ark. 59.2%, Utah 30.7% (kaiser health statistics)

      Out of wedlock births: Mo. 74%, Ks. 76%, Ok. 61%, Ark. 30%,Mich 85%, Utah 57% ( Gov statistics )

      Make of this what you will, but it looks as though the wholesome midwest has some problems of their own to worry about, right along with Utah. Looks like the Mormons and the Baptists are getting their groove on just like the Catholics! lol ( all in fun, no offense to anyone)



  5. ansonburlingame

     /  April 25, 2012


    Go to some Mormon “village”, a small town in Utah for example. Think you will find high crime or a ghetto therein? those folks have real values, values to be admired. It is the social “force” that demands those values that some abhore for sure. But again, you won’t find any ghettos therein in such places.



    • Sedate Me

       /  April 29, 2012

      Yeah, like great values like black people are the Children of Ham and have the mark of Cain.


  6. ansonburlingame

     /  April 26, 2012


    I of course was not attempting to defend any particular area of the country. Single parent births are an epidemic, nationally, and destroying the “fabric” of American society. The desire for SEX is the underlying cause, not lack of money.

    Aligning natural sexual instincts through common social norms is the traditional manner for the millenia to control such instincts. A sex education class in school does little or nothing to establish such common social norms.

    Here is “how to do it”, now go pick up a condum as you leave and “go have fun” seems to be the advice today. And the MEN in particular, bear little or no social criticism after bad consequences result from “having fun”.



    • I agree 100% that single parenting among young uneducated “women” is a national tragedy and a bridge to poverty. The data I found does show that no particular parts of this country is immune. I have to say that I was a bit surprised by the data I found.



    • Sedate Me

       /  April 29, 2012

      Yeah, because if there’s one thing you can count on teenagers to do, it’s pay attention in class and do what they’re told.


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