Akin Is “Our Guy” Says Ozark Billy

Southwest Missouri congressman Ozark Billy, who recently and stupidly said, “We’re not the land of the free anymore,” has now thrown his considerable weight—that’s not really a metaphor—behind the embattled Todd Akin, according to Politico:

First-term Rep. Billy Long, who represents the conservative southwestern portion of the state, said Akin was the party’s candidate, whom he planned to support.

“The people of Missouri voted for him, and he’s our guy,” Long told POLITICO. “And either you’re for Todd Akin and I’m not for Claire McCaskill. … He’s been an underdog his whole life, he won a lot of races he wasn’t supposed to win, so I think he can win.”

Yep, against the stream of establishment sentiment, our own Ozark Billy is making a gallant stand for ignorance and bigotry, but he’s not the only local embracing  Todd Akin’s “gaffe,” which, of course was not a gaffe but a rare moment of honesty and clarity.

Jasper County pooh-bah and resident Christian moralist-slash-Glenn Beck fan, John Putnam, said Mittens “needs to rescind” his demand that Akin give up the fight, and he offered this:

I think Reince Priebus and Roy Blunt and all the people need to support the candidate that the folks from Missouri nominated and picked in the primary. I think the GOP party bosses that are trying to drum him out are creating a bigger split in the party than Todd Akin is.

We’ll see whether Romney, true to form, or Priebus or Blunt waffles on Akin and accepts the Jasper County Republican’s godly counsel, but I have to admit that, for once, I agree with John Putnam. Party bosses—and right now there ain’t no bigger boss than Mittens—are creating a “split” in the party between evangelicals, who actually believe the nutty stuff they say, and regular party guys—characters who wouldn’t know Jesus if he jolted them with a bolt of overdue lightning—who use those evangelicals to obtain political power.

But my guess is that the evangelicals who are being used will, despite their Akin-induced dissatisfaction with the party honchos, nevertheless come to GOP Jesus and work hard to get their superiors elected, what with that Black Devil, Barack What’s-His-Unholy Name, lurking in the electoral shadows.

Meanwhile, the Black Devil’s Missouri handmaiden, Claire McCaskill, will likely save her job, despite the fact that the faithful, led by conservative crusader and buffet king Billy Long, will try their best to exorcise her evil self from the United States Senate.



  1. What more proof do the women in this area need to know that Long and his supporters do not have their best interests at heart. It really surprises me to see so many females at Long and Romney’s campaign stops. As with the economy, women are voting against their own interests by supporting these so-called evangelicals (Did Jesus tell the money-changers to take over the temple, raise taxes on the poor, and let them die if they did not have insurance? No, he did not. The evangelicals are worshiping the wrong God) and lovers of greed. It makes no sense for them to support a Mormon over a Christian either, but this is Southwest Missouri, where Hitler could probably get elected if he had an elephant next to his name.


  2. ansonburlingame

     /  August 28, 2012

    So says JD, “…..where Hitler could probably get elected if he had an elephant next to his name.” Might I suggest that if “Hitler” was opposed by a Lenin/Stalin ticket Graham and his commenters on this blog would support Lenin and Stalin.

    So what? Certainly that is NOT the extreme of the decisions confronting us in the Nov election. Or are you suggesting that Akin is equal to Hitler???

    60% McCaskill and 40% Akin, state wide is my predicition, probably plus or minus 5%. As well it will probably be a 60% majority in Jasper County for Akin as well. But again, so what?



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