You will no doubt remember the Joplin middle-school teacher, Randy Turner, who, among other things, has been accused of corrupting the local youth by allegedly urging them to read and discuss some “obscene material he authored.”
Now it appears the school district has recently found additional reasons to fire Mr. Turner (yet another book is involved), but the most scurrilous charge remains essentially the same, that Turner provided and promoted a book, or two,
that contains graphic depictions of sexuality rape, infidelity, profanity, domestic violence and school violence to twelve, thirteen, and fourteen year old children…
As I have indicated before, Mr. Turner has denied that he provided and promoted the material to the kiddies, and he will presumably put up a defense on May 23 before the Board of Education, but when I was thinking about this again, I decided Mr. Turner shouldn’t take all the blame for corrupting the youth.
There are other stories out there that “twelve, thirteen, and fourteen year old children” are potentially exposed to every day that are even better than Turner’s stories because, for many, many people, they are true stories. One such story goes like this:
A long, long time ago, a priestly fella decided to take himself a mistress. And when I say “take,” I mean take. You could do that in those days because, well, women weren’t really people like they are, at least in some places, today.
At some point, the woman apparently screwed around with another guy and left the priestly fella. She went back home to her dad and was there for four months, when the priestly fella decided he wanted his mistress back.
So, he went to her dad’s house and tried to win back her affections. At first she resisted, but her father insisted she go back home with the priestly fella. Soon, the couple were together again and headed back to their home.
Alas, because home was a long way off, they couldn’t get there in one day. They had to stay overnight in a strange town. But they didn’t want to stay in some kind of sin city. They wanted a town they could trust. A town that shared their religious beliefs. So, they picked such a town.
But it turned out they had a hard time finding a place to stay in the town. Luckily, though, a stranger, an old man, offered them lodging, and things were looking up. Except this was a very strange town. In fact, the place was so strange, that the men of the town were accustomed to banging on the doors of local houses and asking for—no, demanding—sex. And, although you couldn’t have guessed it, in the case of the priestly fella, these men wanted to have sex with him!
Well, the old man who owned the house wasn’t about to let that happen. He apparently thought homosexuality was a very grave sin. So, he and the priestly fella, who had very priestly principles, came up with a plan to avoid trouble and the disgrace of homosexual rape. The old man offered them his virgin daughter for the night! And, to boot, he offered them the priestly fella’s mistress! A two-for-one deal! “Do what you want with them,” the old man pleaded, “just leave the priestly fella alone!”
But the ravenous men were not satisfied. So, our priestly fella acted fast. He brought out his mistress for them to see. And, voilà, that did the trick. She must have been exceptionally hot. The men who had been clamoring for a piece of the priestly fella, suddenly accepted the offer of his mistress.
The men repeatedly raped her all night long. All night long. In fact, they did such violence to her that she barely made it back to the old man’s porch, where she collapsed. Our priestly fella found her there the next morning, and said, “Get up! Let’s go!” But he got no response. So, he loaded up her apparently lifeless body and took her the rest of the way home.
But the story doesn’t end there. Our priestly fella had a message to send. When he got his mistress to his house, he got out a big, big knife and cut her into twelve pieces, limb by limb. Not eleven, not thirteen, but twelve pieces. He mailed the twelve pieces to various places around the country to remind all of his religious brethren just how much evil there is in the world and to fear God.
That grisly story, I would bet, is more lurid than anything ever conceived in the mind of a middle-school teacher in Joplin who has been charged with, essentially, exposing children to sex and violence in his books. And I would also bet that just about every middle-school kid in Joplin has a copy of that story on the family bookshelf, available to all eyes and minds.
It can be found in the book of Judges, Chapter 19, of the Holy Bible.