A Brazilian Waxing

Donald Trump’s fairly comprehensive victory in South Carolina yesterday of course has a lot of Republicans worried. And by “a lot of Republicans” I mean those who don’t want their party to be represented by a bigoted xenophobic billionaire, a sexist buffoon who thinks our current African-American president is too much African and not enough American, who believes that Mexican immigrants tend to be rapists and killers, and, well, you know the long list of embarrassing and dangerous nonsense he has uttered.

Just how many of those Republicans who worry about the appearance of the party are actually left in the party remains to be seen. But what doesn’t remain to be seen is perhaps the most significant result of yesterday’s Republican primary. The party, for good or for ill, has now deliberately de-Bushed. The party’s pubes have been waxed. And who knew that jeb waxingamong Donald Trump’s increasing talents as a Republican front-runner was a talent for stripping clean the party’s privvies, a talent for ridding the GOP of unwanted Bush? Trump’s devastating attacks on Jeb effectively branded him as an unsightly growth, something that, as much as it might hurt, had to go. “Enough is Enough- no more Bushes!” exclaimed The Donald.

Wikipedia tells us that Brazilian waxing “can be a physically painful experience during and after.” We have all seen the agony as the campaign has progressed and we saw it last night as Jeb, without the exclamation mark, surrendered his campaign. You could hear the moans and groans of a party in pain, as the last strip of Bush was hurtfully stripped away. Wikipedia also reminds us of an important fact about Brazilian waxing:

There is also a health risk involved if it is not done properly, as well as a risk of infection if done on a person with a weakened immune system.

Trump’s rise and his latest success proves that the Republican Party has a weakened immune system. There’s no doubt about it. And that weakened establishment system is working overtime to fight the pathogens in the party. What we don’t yet know, however, is whether that system will prevail, or, after the waxing of Jeb Bush, whether a devastating infection is to follow, that is, the nomination of Donald J. Trump.

 

18 Comments

  1. I am so happy that the GOP has removed Bush. I still have enough faith that the American electorate will not stoop so low to elect Trump–there aren’t enough old, white men, hypocritical evangelicals, or young, ignorant gun-lovers in the country to elect this privileged idiot.

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    • Jim,

      I sort of liked having Bush around because it reminded voters just how much his brother mucked up the country, both at home and abroad. And I agree with you (and President Obama, by the way) that we should retain enough faith in a majority of Americans to believe that a buffoon cannot become president. Although I admit in my worst moments I have my eyes closed and fingers crossed.

      Duane

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  2. Duane,

    Sometimes it’s hard to see the forest for the Bushes. A few days ago, Robert Reich posted a thought provoking essay titled, “The Death of the Republican Party.” http://robertreich.org/post/139385548525

    Should be required reading for all voters, but especially Republican voters. Although it may be extra hard for the members of the GOP to hack their way out of the bubble and face reality.

    Herb

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    • I love Robert Reich. He is one of my favorite lefties. Most of the time he talks absolute sense, as in what you referenced. About the only time he strays is when he talks about Bernie v. Hillary. He has been totally oblivious to the idea that a general election featuring Bernie Sanders would be a very difficult election to even keep close, much less win. But I will overlook that one fault because I know it comes from a good place: his heart for average folks out there who are getting screwed by the moneyed interests.

      Duane

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    • Herb, I read your Robert Reich link on the death of the GOP. Short, accurate, right to the point. There are still core elements of the old party around; I read about them from time to time. But, they seem helpless before the Trump juggernaut . . .

      Whatever happened to the GOP party platform? Oh, wait. I found it on The DailyKos:

      Full Snark Version

      We are for jobs and growth, which we will create by wrecking the economy with tax cuts, deregulation, and military spending, and not investing in education, health care, or infrastructure. Or better still, a vicious minority holds, by shutting down the government completely and cutting off its funding, both.
      We are for balancing the budget on the backs of the poor by imposing regressive taxes and by indiscriminately wrecking both welfare programs and programs that people pay for, including unemployment, Social Security, and Medicare.
      We are for women’s health, which we will improve by denying access to reproductive services.
      We are for everybody’s health, which we will improve by denying access to any health care services that we don’t need or want for ourselves, especially Medicaid, ACA subsidies, and medical marijuana.
      We are against racism so much that it is already over, apart from reverse racism.
      We are for life, which we will protect by measures that will kill women and babies, and increase teen pregnancy and abortion rates.
      We are for students learning real-world economics by starting their careers in crushing debt peonage after substandard for-profit college educations, after substandard for-profit charter schools and teaching to the high-stakes testing regime. No civics class for you!
      We are for LGBT rights, specifically the right to not be LGBT, which we will protect via quack conversion therapies.
      We are for workers’ Right to Work, that is, to mooch off union organizing without paying dues, or not to have a union at all.
      We are for freedom and democracy around the world, which we will enforce at gunpoint by breaking down all existing public institutions in your country and feeding massive corruption. Did you hear Marco Rubio call for yet another New American Century?
      We are for peace, which we will achieve by !!!More Wars More!!! starting with boots on the ground in Iran.
      We are for gun safety, which can only be achieved when everybody has enough guns to defend themselves against everybody else’s the bad guys‘ guns, especially the US military and the UN and the FEMA Death Camp goons.
      We are for immigrant rights, back wherever you came from, even if you are legitimate refugees fleeing for your lives.
      We are for religious freedom, especially freedom to impose our religion on others.
      We are for Muslim rights, which we will protect by demonizing all Muslims until they shape up and deserve them.
      We are totally for the right of Israel to be a Jewish, democratic state secure within the borders of Palestine, and to nuke Iran (and, according to a particularly vicious minority, start the Armageddon War).
      We are for freedom of speech—for money: One dollar, one vote.
      We are for Global Warming I mean Climate Change I mean…Oh, you know what I mean! CO2 is plant food! Who needs snow?

      All I can think of to add is:

      Enhanced interrogation techniques are good, provided they are only used on bad people.

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      • Ouch! This list of GOP “Principles” looks a lot like the list that Will McAvoy of “Newsroom” gave for the American Taliban, but longer. Lincoln, T. Roosevelt, Goldwater and even Reagan are no doubt rolling in their graves.

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  3. Ben Field

     /  February 22, 2016

    If the GOP establishment throws its support behind Rubio and pisses Trump off enough to go independent, he take many Republicans with him. Rubio and Cruz are unelectable based on their abortion, that a woman must carry to term a baby born of incest or rape. There is absolutely no reason Democrats shouldn’t win the Presidency and name the next justice.

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  4. Ben Field

     /  February 22, 2016

    If the GOP establishment throws its support behind Rubio and pisses Trump off enough to go independent, he takes many Republicans with him. Rubio and Cruz are unelectable based on their abortion policies, that a woman must carry to term a baby born of incest or rape. There is absolutely no reason Democrats shouldn’t win the Presidency and name the next justice.

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    • I think Cruz is toast already. I never thought he had the slightest chance of being the nominee. You are right about Rubio’s extreme position on abortion. Hillary can make a lot out of that and revive enthusiasm among women, especially young women, when they find out how far out Rubio is. My guess is that he would try to blunt such an attack by saying that his views don’t matter all that much, since the issue has been addressed by the Court. But, as we all know, it matters who he would put on the court because Roe v. Wade is even now hanging by a very thin thread.

      As for Trump going independent, I don’t see it. He may get mad, if he thinks the nomination was stolen from him. He may throw a tantrum even. But I’m betting he won’t throw his money away on such an effort because as ignorant as he is about a lot of things, even he can figure out he has no chance to win as an independent. Thus, he would have to spend an awful lot of money just to get even with the Republican establishment. As niggardly as he is with money, I don’t see that happening.

      Duane

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  5. Poor Jeb! I wonder if the ad showing his engraved semiautomatic handgun might have been the last nail in his political coffin? It reminded me of Michael Dukakis driving the tank. Cognitive dissonance. And what will he do now? Political magic tricks? Indeed, who else could make $120 million dollars disappear without a ripple?

    I worry about the looming Democratic win of the presidency. Unless the party wins back the Senate it will be four more years of bitter gridlock. But it’s better than the alternative, I suppose. A Trump win would be the purge that would either cleanse the bowels or kill the patient.

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    • My other concern here is with Hillary. If you think the right wing was rough on Obama, just wait until Mrs. Clinton moves into the White House. That particular animus will no doubt escalate for at least four years.

      That’s why, as a pragmatist, I’m supporting Kasich. He’s proven he can reach across party lines to get stuff done. And at least one national poll shows him beating Hillary in a national race. Sadly, it doesn’t look like that match-up will happen.

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      • Herb,

        I don’t understand at all your support for Kasich just because you are a pragmatist. You say he has proven he can reach across party lines to get stuff done. Even if that were true (it is a bit of a sham), if he wins the election he won’t have to reach across any party lines. The GOP will have it all. And just look at Kasich’s record, not only on things like abortion rights and labor issues, but on fiscal issues. I heard him say the same old thing the other day: Cut taxes and balance the budget are his priorities. Gee, I wonder who will pay the price for that old supply-side nonsense?

        Duane

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        • Duane,

          My rationale for picking Kasich is fairly simple. He is the least worst of right wing nuts he’s running against. Sadly, this is what politics have come down to – choosing the best of the worst. But you gotta play the hand you’re dealt.

          My scenario is that Hillary will get the nomination. At that point, the Republicans will reach into their dirty tricks bag and no doubt throw in a few new ones to boot. It’ll will be like Benghazi and the email-gate on steroids. She’s going to be beaten up pretty badly by November. And that may create enough doubt to keep her from being elected.

          But if she does get the golden ring, her ability to function in office will be like Obama’s. The American Taliban will be relentless at putting up roadblocks at every turn. It will be a bloodletting like nothing we’ve seen before. Wouldn’t be surprised if s bill of impeachment was introduced early on. In short, I believe the election of Hillary Clinton will become a nightmare worse than W, if that’s possible.

          The only way to prevent that is to get a Republican in office who can say things that don’t make our heads explode. Of those in the hunt, I see Kasich as the least harmful to our sanity.

          Of course, if you have an alternative, I’s be more than happy to see it.

          Herb

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        • It may of may not be pertinent, but if you check PolitiFact, you’ll see Kasich’s statements are true or mostly true 52% of the time. http://www.politifact.com/personalities/john-kasich/

          Hillary is virtually tied with Kasich at 51% http://www.politifact.com/personalities/hillary-clinton/

          Compare those percentages with Trump, who gets 7% true or mostly true, or Carson with 15%, or Rubio who gets 36%, or Cruz at 21%.

          And both Kasich and Hillary beat Obama’s 48% of true or mostly true statements. Meanwhile, Bernie comes in with 49%. Close enough for government work.

          Interesting, but probably useless as hell.

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    • And speaking of Kasich, I just came across this video. It’s not too hard to vote for a Republican if it’s one like him. Not perfect, but who is.

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      • Glad you showed us that, Herb. Egads, the man actually sounds sane!

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      • The problem, Herb, is Kasich doesn’t talk like that anymore. He is much more careful about running a “positive” campaign and he is getting smashed by those who have figured out the weird dynamic of the Republican primary process this year. “What has happened to the party? What has happened to the conservative movement? he said way back in October. He ain’t saying that now, my friend.

        By the way, as Sasmantha Bee points out, Kasich, although much more palatable than the rest of the field, is no moderate. Have a look:

        Liked by 1 person

    • Jim,

      There is a decent chance of winning back the presidency if Hillary wins and if the GOP nominates Trump. But even if we don’t win both, sometimes, as I have said before, you have to play smart defense in order to ultimately win. And smart defense in this case is control of the Supreme Court, which can only come by winning the White’s House.

      Duane

      Liked by 1 person

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