Mike Pence: “It’s The Greatest Honor Of My Life” Being “Shoulder to Shoulder” With An Admitted Sexual Predator

At this point in this long and ugly campaign, what else can be said? If you watched that debate last night (not to mention the circus leading up to it) and believe Donald Trump is qualified in any way to be president of the United States, then, like Trump, there is something wrong with you that a stadium full of psychiatrists, or a coliseum full of priests, can’t fix. The man is a creep. A lie-stained lunatic. A dangerous authoritarian who would, as he openly stated last night, use his presidential power to jail his political enemies—and only Allah knows what else he would do.

Since there is almost nothing else left to say about Trump’s lack of character and his lack of class and his lack of competence, I do want to say something about his running mate, the Jesus-loving, God-fearing, family values-honoring, Mike Pence. This morning I heard Mr. Pence say, as he does all the time, that being Trump’s running mate is “the greatest honor of my life” and that he is proudly standing “shoulder to shoulder” with Trump, with the same Trump who, behind closed doors, admitted that sexually assaulting women—with impunity—is one of the benefits of being a “star.” And pence on cnn.jpgjust why did Pence say he still wants to shoulder-kiss a man who believes fame entitles him to freely fondle the genitals of, say, Mike Pence’s daughters? Because, as the born-again VP candidate told CNN’s Alisyn Camerota, Trump “said last night very clearly that that was talk, not actions. And I believe him.”

Let’s think about that for a minute. Pence said that he believes Trump when Trump finally denied—after trying to dodge the question from Anderson Cooper three times last night—he has kissed and fondled women without their permission. Let it sink in just how that must sound to children around the country. A presidential candidate actually has to tell us that when he bragged about being a sexual predator, he was essentially just having a good time with the boys on the bus and he didn’t really mean it. And his running mate actually has to tell us that it is okay with him that Trump lied about being a sexual predator because he was merely talking about being a sexual predator and not acting on the talk. It really is breathtaking.

Here’s an excerpt from Trump’s infamous bus conversation:

TRUMP: I’ve gotta use some Tic Tacs, just in case I start kissing her. You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything.

BILLY BUSH: Whatever you want.

TRUMP: Grab them by the p***y. You can do anything.

Trump, according to Pence, was simply kiddin’ around when he said he was “automatically” prone to “just start kissing” women he found “beautiful.” That was “talk, not actions” said Pence. But what kind of man would pretend, while working on a TV show that highlights beautiful women, that he cannot control himself around them? What kind of man would lie to others about his inability to prevent himself from sexually assaulting women? Is that the kind of man that a born-again Pence wants to stand shoulder to shoulder with? Would he want his two daughters, or his wife, to stand shoulder to shoulder with Trump? Or does Pence believe that the women in his life are not attractive enough to trigger an “automatic” response from the Orange Groper?

We all have asked, when trying to comprehend Trump, what kind of a creep is this? But now, as we try to understand how Pence—who claims the moral high ground with every Christian breath—can proudly embrace Trump, it is time to ask, what kind of creep is Mike Pence?

The Department Of Um

I took several pages of notes while I was watching the Republican debate last night on CNBC.  Fortunately, Rick Perry’s cringe-inducing performance made them all useless.  As soon as he had his moment of discomfiture, I stopped writing. 

It was just too sad and pathetic.  It’s as if the groom had passed a boisterous blast of noxious gas during the “I do” part of the wedding. Sure, it was unforgivable, obviously it was funny, but at the same time it was kind of like, “Hasn’t the guy suffered enough, God? Send down the angels and put him out of his misery.”

Of all the words I might have expected to hear at a GOP primary debate, “oops” wasn’t one of them.  But there it was, out of the mouth of Rick Perry, which may have been the most honest thing he has ever uttered in one of those silly debates.  Indeed, it may have been the most honest thing any of them have ever uttered.

I don’t know, but if you are talking about what you would do if people were dumb enough to elect you president, and you then begin a sentence—in your most authoritative and emphatic voice—with the words,

It’s three government agencies when I get there that are gone…

you might make sure that you had the names of those three agencies written on the palm of your hand, like Sarah Palin would. You don’t want to mess this one up. It’s your moment. It’s your chance to prove how decisive you are, how much you have thought about the subject, how committed you are to your small-gov’mint principles.

But, alas, Perry wasn’t even smart enough to come up with a Palin-palm cheat sheet. So, he continued:

Commerce, Education and the, um, what’s the third one there…Let’s see…So Commerce, Education, and, uh, the uh, um, um…The third agency of government…I would do away with the education, the, um, Commerce, and let’s see. I can’t think of the third one. I can’t. Sorry. Oops.”

There it is in one word.  The one word that any fair-minded observer of the Republican primary process would use to describe the past few months, as these candidates have revealed themselves to the public:


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